i love my therapist but i hate being in therapy. 10 minutes before my appointment, i’m in a meeting with my boss - we discuss my artistic choices; my boss recommends i artistically choose less. 10 minutes after therapy, i wash my hair and think about everything that was said, and then i have to switch it off, like a lamp, and go back to work again.
i was on a walk the other day and someone had the perfect combination of his cologne and whatever-else. it was almost exactly his scent. i fucking hate that. after all these years, i remember that? i tell my therapist - i feel like a fucking wolf. try telling a middle-aged blonde lady. oh i scented him on the air. i’m 30, and i’m having a panic attack over something that would be a plotline in the omegaverse.
what they don’t tell you about mental illness is that if you are lucky enough to survive it into adulthood; it becomes a weird slice of your life. because you do, eventually, have to build a life. i realized in a panic somewhere around 22 - oh. i don’t know what i’m fucking doing, because i always assumed i’d just go ahead and die. i didn’t die, and i’m grateful for that, and i’m very happy about that choice. but it does mean that i am an adult in an apartment, living with my conditions side-by-side like. oh, that’s my roommate, adhd.ignore the glass, bytheway, that’s ocd.
so you pick your stupid life up by the scruff of the neck and you’re, like glad for it (so much laughter and light and friends you would have never thought possible, when you were in the worst of it). but it feels so strange to be dancing around these odd little microcosms, these patchwork moments of your symptoms. if you have a panic attack at night, you still need to wake up and walk the dog in the morning. if your depression is making everything boring, well, you don’t have any sick days left, and a job’s not really supposed to be that exciting anyway. your ocd tears out each individual leg hair, and then, an hour later, you sigh, patch up the bloody bits, and go get dinner with friends. and the life is kitten-quiet, mewling and pathetic, but it’s also like - it’s yours, so you’re fond of it.
and it’s like - you’re real. so you still enjoy pushing the shopping cart really fast and then riding on the back of it down an empty aisle. and you’re not, like, so sick anymore that when you accidentally drop a mug you burst into tears (except for the days you do that. which are bad). and no, you’re not allowed around certain items anymore. oops! but you’ve learned to be good about brushing your teeth most days of the week. and you sometimes in the middle of the day you have a little freak-out about how fucking unfair it all is, how fucking hard, how other people can just do this without having to fucking hurt the whole time. and then you sigh and force yourself to sit down and fucking journal about it so you can tell the nice middle-aged blonde woman yeah i had a hard day but i practiced grounding. you still sometimes want to burst out of your own skin, but you force yourself to eat kind-of healthy and to take your vitamins. you let yourself chop off all your hair in the sink in a dramatic poetry of control and relief - and you also have developed good hobbies that help you move your body more frequently. you feel helplessly behind, lost in the shuffle - but you also practice gratitude, taking stock of what you have garnered. because you’re trying. even if you’re never gonna be normal, you have something… close enough.
and the little kitten of your life, this mangy, starlit tigercub, this thing you expected to rot so young: in your arms, it turns itself over, belly-up. exposing this new soft part, all the organs and guts. like it’s saying i trust you now. youwon’t give me up.
I think that if Carrot and Laios ever met, the fact that they are very similar would be very apparent to literally everyone except them. Like Carrot would file Laios away in the same category as one of various museum curators (“a real expert on the study of eating monsters!”), while Laios would think of Carrot as someone similar to Kabru. Meanwhile Angua just saw two people have an in-depth twenty-minute conversation about dwarven battle bread and is just like “oh god, there’s two of them.”
Chilchuck would approve of Angua except for her getting into a relationship with a coworker
Senshi is brought in by the Watch after accidentally killing several Ankh-Morpork citizens by feeding them the first nutritious food they’ve ever had, disrupting the delicate pollution-and-grease-based ecosystem of their bodies
Hey so I still see people utterly baffled by how religious fundies (still a majority in America and moreso its senate) react on certain issues so uhhh is it actually not common knowledge what the antichrist is all about? You guys know his defining characteristic is ending war, right? That he’s foretold to unite the world under his leadership by preaching global peace and solving basically every single problem in the world? So you know when you try to talk to these people about equality and togetherness they literally believe that’s what makes you an agent of the devil right???
im sorry what. so. ok im assuming they think that this is all like. to gain trust and then take over or something? because.
Yes, he’s called the “antichrist” because he’s an imposter Jesus and the majority of the world will love him when he ends all class divides and erases all borders, creating one world government with him at the top. That’s the “new world order” they’re terrified of. But they think he’ll oppress true Christian believers who see through his ruse, which is why they’re constantly looking for signs that they’re being discriminated against and panic when they lose any control over government. This is why they fear diversity, immigration, socialized anything. The less religious right are pretty clearly still running on the same logic; they might drop some of the spiritual lore but this is where they get the idea that all progressivism leads to the “real” fascism. Some believe the antichrist isn’t a literal person either but just that entire set of beliefs, so everyone protesting against war and trying to feed the hungry is a *collective* antichrist.
So from the notes it turns out people are MUCH less familiar with all this than I suspected and that’s honestly kind of alarming, guys, you should really really pay attention to things that affect so much of this country. No these are absolutely not obscure or fringe beliefs, these are MAINSTREAM with megachurches, Trump voters, the GOP and a vast proportion of the wealthy. Alex Jones and multiple Fox News hosts openly believe word for word what I described here.
And yeah as several people pointed out it isn’t even explicitly in the bible, but something some radicals pieced together in maybe only the last century. My uncles all believe it to the letter and they all believe it’s what the Bible is “supposed” to be communicating.
A lot of people are also confused as to why they would believe the peace and unity are villainous things and what the difference even is then between the “antichrist” and actual Jesus, which brings me to another thing I realize some folks CRITICALLY overlook about American Christianity, which is that they do not believe in good or bad deeds. They believe the same deed can be right or wrong strictly according to whether or not it’s performed by a believer with God’s stamp of approval. Like, they KNOW the Satanic Church and Witch Covens do community service or donate to cancer research and they are not confused, surprised, bitter or embarrassed by that at all. It’s exactly what they’re taught to expect. They believe the forces of Satan do primarily “good” things so people will think he’s just as good or better than God. So if a pastor heals a sick child with a prayer then that’s good, but if a “witch” heals the same sick child with “magic” (not something I believe exists, but they do) then that’s a false miracle from the devil and the child was better off dying because now everyone involved is a sinner who deserves hell. They’re taught to view you as a ridiculous fool if you don’t grasp this difference, and every single argument you might make is a part of the satanic trickery.
After all, they think our entire existence on this Earth is an insignificant speck in the grand scheme of things. The suffering in the world isn’t a bug to them, but a feature that God set up to test everyone’s worthiness, teach them lessons and filter out the faithless, so they actively do not believe it’s always morally right in itself to help people or save lives. Rather, certain people are just intended to suffer and die and it can be MORE wrong to help them.
Sorry to put this big ass thing on your dashboards again but I’m downright awestruck by the notes. There’s 15,500 of them at the time of this reblog and almost zero disagreement, just hundreds of people expressing absolute terror that they didn’t realize they were living under the thumb of a doomsday cult, and I’m really really sorry for that because I really did not expect to be the bearer of that news to so many. If you haven’t looked at the notes for yourself though, they’re pretty eye opening even to me, especially the next most common type of response on it:
….And something I’ve heard before but still neglected to mention:
…..so that’s all pretty nightmarish confirmation of how pervasive this mindset is around here, but you know, if the majority of reactions to this information have been either “what the fuck are you talking about?” or “yeah I WAS taught this and I’m better now,” maybe that’s a sign that it’s slowly but consistently fading with every generation?
I actually wasn’t raised religious AT ALL, and it was still impossible for me to not hear this shit constantly in the 80′s and 90′s from basically everyone outside my immediate family. It’d even crop up on television and radio stations that weren’t even supposed to be christian-oriented. Just boom, there’s an evangelist suddenly talking about how Only God is Allowed to End War and Satan Takes the Form of Kindness, like these were just normal banal perspectives to toss in between a relationship advice segment and the latest movie reviews.
I’m really proud of every person saying they escaped from that indoctrination and actually feel much better and more hopeful about the whole thing. It might not be fixed completely in our lifetimes but clearly it is fixable.
I was going full wait this can’t be real but uhhh this article provides a good summary of this phenomenon
i will remember with absolute clarity, when the thought strikes me that i have a text to send someone, that this is the fourth time in three days i’ve attempted to send this specific text
i will forget, in the time it takes me to pick up my phone, that i picked it up intending to send a text
this is something that I think a lot of people don’t understand abt adhd. and like. this shit can get scary, especially if it happens often. I hate that I can’t remember what I’m doing for the entire time it takes me to do it. I hate having to pause in the middle of conversations to desperately attempt to re-trace my train of thought because I don’t remember what we’re talking about. like. if you don’t have adhd. just try to imagine what it’s like to be unable to carry out a full conversation. try to imagine your memory resetting at random intervals. what are you doing right now? do you know? because often times, I fucking Forget. in the middle of doing things. and then I’m just standing there like an idiot desperately trying to wave away the thick fog that exists in my brain 24/7. and sometimes that shit just doesn’t work. and I forget for good. it’s terrifying. to me, at least.
having a freeze response to stress is so funny in the context of normal adult stressors. millions of years of evolution are trying to tell me that the email will not find me if i stay very still and do nothing
oh one source of bad information by robert bly we’re really in it now
![A screenshot of Wikipedia, showing three captioned images and a block of text at the bottom. Image 1 depicts the process of barnacles growing on a tree slowly becoming geese that swim away. The caption reads, "Barnacles turning into geese, in the 1552 Cosmographia." Image 2 is a photo of a barnacle with a vaguely goose-shaped upper half. The caption reads, "The goose barnacle." Image 3 is a photo of a goose with black and white colouration in a sort of stripey stoney pattern. The caption reads, "The barnacle goose." The block of text at the bottom reads, "In the Middle Ages, it was thought that the goose barnacle gave birth to the barnacle goose, supporting the virgin birth of Jesus.[24]"](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c13014b951188af47c11310732abc81d/87555d4651b79cd9-3a/s500x750/bba5260e8d16c24657e03412b2a107a4612d62a2.jpg)
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